


If I'm Louder

by Beef_jerk_me, CoffeesForFuckers



Category: Egorapter, Game Grumps, Ninja Sex Party - Fandom, youtube - Fandom
Genre: Cute, Depression, Egobang - Freeform, Falling In Love, Gay, Happy, Loss, Love, Need, Pain, Sad, Sorrow, love sick, pain of love
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-01-14
Updated: 2016-04-27
Packaged: 2018-05-13 21:06:28
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 7
Words: 10,648
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5717077
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Beef_jerk_me/pseuds/Beef_jerk_me, https://archiveofourown.org/users/CoffeesForFuckers/pseuds/CoffeesForFuckers
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>“It’s 3 AM and all I want is, your lips on mine… It’s the same time as yesterday, at 7 PM, or last Thursday, at noon. It’s the same as every hour, every minute, every second, since I’ve met you."</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

 

Danny laid in bed, tossing and turning, an ache in his chest that wouldn’t leave and burning hot tears poring down his face. He was so good at hiding this, all the pain running through him, just knowing that the only person he could ever love could never love him the same way. His chest ached from his shattered heart stabbing into it, and his lungs burned from the lack of air he could get into them due to his heavy sobbing and his body was numb from the pain of his loneliness. Never could Danny feel like he wasn’t lonely, weather he was in a crowded room full of people or with a woman asleep next to him, Dan felt empty and it hurt more than he ever thought. Falling in love, it is the most painful experience anyone could ever feel. Danny wanted to go back to when he could lay in silence and he would just be so happy and carefree, now if he lays in that same silence he would kill himself.

Danny let out a sob as he pulled his knees to his chest, gripping them tightly, wanting the pain to go way, but it just wouldn’t, "Why me? Why am I doomed to feeling this way forever?" Cried Danny to himself. The male heard a soft knock on his door, making him stiffen. Barry. Dan couldn’t let Barry see him like this, he couldn’t let _anyone_ see him like this. Daniel swallows hard and cleared his throat, trying to wipe away the tears to no avail, "Y-Yeah?" Dan bit his lip, "Fuck." He muttered under his breath at how pathetic his voice was.

  
"You alright? Sounds like you’re hurt?" Barry asked.

  
"I’m fine." He replied quickly.

  
"Are you sure, Danny?"

"I’m sure, go away!" Snapped Danny, he felt bad about it but he just couldn’t handle this right now. Slowly Dan got up from his bed, giving up on trying to get the sweet bliss of sleep and making his way to the ensuite attached to his room. The male glanced at the clock on his bedside table, 2:48am. Danny let out a long, heavy sigh as he pushed the door to his bathroom open and flicked the light on. The sleep-deprived boy stood in front of the mirror, staring at himself, his eyes narrowing and brows furrowed. The man looking back at him was not himself, this surprised Daniel, making him lean in closer to the reflection and it followed suit.

"T-That can’t be me?" He breathed in confusion, what he saw was a man, withered and tired, not himself. Deep blue/purple bags drooped underneath his now gray eyes. Dan also noticed how scrawny he looked, he looked anorexic, "This can’t be what I’ve become..." Tears fell rapidly down his face.

Dan reached a shaky hand towards his shaving razor before snapping the top off and tugging out a blade. Danny never understood why anybody felt as though they needed to do this, but not anymore, he now felt the numbness of being alone and figured it out, just as he slid the ice cold metal across his wrist. The pain was awful... But he loved it. He felt _alive_.

|-/

Arin smiled wide as he rolled over, half awake, his arms wrapping around Suzy. He was so content and happy the with her, but there was always something deep down, nagging at him but he didn’t know what, so he chose to ignore it.

○○○

The next morning Arin was sat, waiting for Danny to show up, he was an hour late, he was supposed to be here by Ten and now it was 11:13am and he still wasn’t here. Just as Arin went to call Dan the door swung open and in came a mass of hair and a man that could not possibly be the same person he’d seen less than a week ago.

“Danny?” Gaped Arin, wide-eyed at the abnormally pale boy, listlessly approaching him.

“That’s me.” Danny spoke in a way that sounded as if he knew what Arin was thinking at that moment.

“Oh… Are-Are you okay, man?” Arin stood, reaching a shaky hand out towards his deathly-looking friend. Arin’s hand brushed against the taller’s cheek, a cold and empty feeling rushing up his finger tips and arm, making him shiver.

“Just great.” He kept his replies short, his head fogged over with pain and anguish. He just wanted to go back to bed and maybe down a bottle of pills while he was at it.

“Dude, you look like you’re about to die.” He said, still wide-eyed at his friend’s appearance, Danny hadn’t even gotten dressed that morning, unless you count putting on a dirty shirt as getting dressed.

“Feel like it too.” Daniel replied, eyes half-lidded as his knees gave out on him and he collapsed down to the couch.

“You have to go home and get some rest, Dan. We can just make a video tomorrow instead.” Arin told him with eyes full of worry.

“No, it’s fine, I’m okay.” Danny managed to get back up off the couch, and make his way down the short hallway to their recording room.

“Um… O-Okay…” Arin was very against this but Dan was an adult, he was in charge of his own life.

○○○

They finished recording and Dan seemed a bit better than he had been earlier so Arin was less tense about him recording and being out of bed.

“Hey, I think I’m gonna go home, I’m tired and kinda feel… eh?” He shrugged, lying about how he was feeling. He stood from the couch and turned to leave.

“Hey wait!” Arin grabbed for his wrist to stop him from leaving. Danny jerked his arm back, letting out a yelp as he did so, pain shooting through his arm, tears welling in his eyes, “What happened? Did I hurt you?” Arin was so confused in that moment.

“Nothing, no… I-I have to go, Arin. I… Um… I’ll talk to you later.” Danny shook his head, his curls bouncing on his shoulders in the process. Dan quickly left, murmuring an ‘ _I’m sorry_ ’ as he scurried out the door.

Once Danny made it into his care he couldn’t hold back the tears any longer. He gripped the steering wheel as he leaned forward, head rested against the wheel as tears gushed out of his eyes.

_“Why do I have to feel like this…?”_


	2. Two - Losing Himself

Danny was found later that evening by Barry, drunker and higher than ever. Something was very wrong with him and everyone knew it, they just didn’t know what it was or how to fix it, Danny was so secretive about things like this. He didn’t like to open up because he always wanted everyone else to be happy and not feel as bad as he did. Danny also hated how weak he felt, and even was, so he masked it with a smile and a laugh here and there. People believed it, or he at least thought that they did. He hated himself for feeling like this, which only made him feel worse, a smile getting harder and harder to fake and a laugh getting harder and harder to make. Danny was no longer their, he was just a shell of his former self, broken and battered.

Barry watched the male, sitting in front of the static television, staring off into space. If Barry couldn’t tell he was breathing he would think Danny were dead. He looked nothing like the man he and everyone else had known. Barry knew that Danny was gone from his sunken in expression and his lifeless gaze. He couldn’t take it any longer and stepped up to the dazed man, pressing two fingers to his neck, just to make sure. He was, of course, alive but he wasn’t well, Daniel wasn’t in his right mind and that was apparent.

“Danny?” Barry said, shaking his friend. Danny continued to stare off into nothingness, “Hey, Dan? You okay?” Barry had begun to panic.

“Huh?” Hummed the boy, snapping back into reality, beginning to giggle for no reason, “Oh hey, Barry, when’s you get here?” Danny said without a care in the world.

“Danny, listen to me, are you okay?” Barry asked worriedly, looking into Danny’s red, bloodshot eyes.

“I’m fine.” He slurred, smiling a dumb, high out of his mind smile at the other man stood over him.

“Dude, you’re drunk out of your mind and look as though you’re about to die. What’s going on?” Demanded Barry.

“It’s none of your fuckin' business, Barry!” Danny snapped, pushing the other off of him as he stood, almost tipping over again.

“Danny there is something fucking wrong with you! I’m trying to help you!” Shouted Barry, standing in front of Dan.

“I'm fine! Why can’t you just fucking listen, Barry, I don’t need, or want your damn help!” He growled, fists balled at his sides, sobering up slightly.

“I’m calling Arin, I can’t deal with you and he seems to be the only one you’ll listen to.” Barry went to step away from Dan but the older grabber his arm in an overly tight grasp.

“Don’t you dare, Barry.” Danny hissed, “I swear to fucking god, Barry if you do it-“

“What? What will you fucking do Daniel? Huh? Hit me?” Barry spun to face him, “That’s not going to help you at all and you’re going to end up dead if you keep going the way your going… But that’s not my problem.” Shrugged Barry, tearing his arm free from Dan's grip.

“You know what? Fuck you, Barry!” He shouted, taking a swing and nailing the other male in the nose.

“What the fuck!?” Barry gasped, clasping a hand over his most-likely broken nose.

“Fuck you, Just-Just fuck you!” Danny said as tears rolled down his cheeks and he hurried from the room, locking himself in his own.

Dan knew he was sick, and he wasn’t getting any better. He stumbled into the connected bathroom, taking his razor in hand. He couldn’t deal with this, he now understood why people did this and he could feel their pain.

Dan pressed the cool metal blade to his just as cold wrist. The boy bit his lip as he slid the sharp item across his paper thin skin, watching the thick red blood slide from his arm, releasing the anxiety, pain and torment from his body, he let out a bittersweet breath and closed his eyes, the red droplets crashed down to the sink. Man, that felt so good. He sucked in a deep breath and smiled a sick smile before he made his next slice.

○○○

Danny showed up early to the Grump office the next morning, surprising everyone. He was even dressed and his hair was – somewhat – tame, though he still didn’t look himself.

“Hey, looks like you’re feeling better, huh?” Smiled Arin, “Where’s Barry? Is he coming in today?” Arin cocked his head to the side in confusion, almost looking like a puppy.

“Don’t know, nor do I care.” Danny grumbled through gritted teeth and shrugged, fists clenched tightly at his sides, making his wrists throb and ache.

“Did you two get in-…” Arin stopped, his jaw dropping as the door swung open to reveal a tired and beaten Barry. His nose was swollen and a dark blue/purple color along with his eyes. This very clearly answered Arin’s question.

“Danny, did _you_ do that!?” Gasped Arin, as he looked over the other male.

“Yeah.” He growled. Both men glared at each other for a while before Danny stomped off to the Grump room, waiting for Arin to come record and trying to cool off. He rubbed at his sore wrists as he sat down on the couch they recorded on. Arin soon entered and sat beside his friend.

“Danny?” Arin spoke up after a while of silence.

“I don’t wanna talk about it.” Groaned Daniel.

“I-… I’m really worried about you Dan… We all are.” Arin said, wringing his hands nervously.

“Well don’t be, I’m fine.” He hissed, not wanting to tell Arin how he felt.

“Okay then… Let’s play something.” Arin steered away from the original conversation.

“Mariokart?” Dan asked hopefully.

“Sure!”

  * §§



“Like… I mean, have you ever just looked at someone and thought _‘I really love you.’_ They’re just, like, talking or humming or watching a movie or reading or something, and there’d something about them in that moment that makes you think _‘wow, I just really love you.’_ ‘Cause that’s how it is with Suzy and I.” Arin said in the middle of a video.

“That’s me with you, because you’re just too perfect and amazing.” Dan spoke honestly, he was always being honest when he said things like this but Arin always took it as a joke and didn’t take Dan seriously about things like that.

“Oh same!” Laughed Arin, “Sorry Suz, Danny and I are married now.” He joked and Dan laughed along, even though the stabbing in his chest was getting worse by the moment.

○○○

Danny stormed out of the recording room, Ross in tow close behind, both screaming at each other over something that Arin wasn’t quite sure of.

“Well, it’s not my fault that _you_ can’t take a damn joke Danny!” Shouted Ross in anger.

“For fuck sakes, Ross! Are you a complete fucking moron!? That wasn’t a fucking joke!” Danny lashed out as he spun around to face Ross, “I told you something fucking personal and you make fun of me in a goddamn _fucking_ video!? Are you serious!?”

“Dude, you and I are the only ones that even fucking know about that! Nobody would even get it or notice!” Ross yelled in response.

“Fuck you, Ross! I know shit about you too! Like remember when you ch-“ Ross had suddenly grabbed Danny by the shirt and pulled him closer, crashing his fist as hard as he could into Danny’s jaw.

“I swear to fucking god, Daniel, if you tell _anybody_ that, I’ll fucking kill you. I will tell all of the Grumps what you told me, I won’t even hesitate.” He threatened the taller man, Danny shoving him back, causing his grip on his former friend to fall loose.

“Go fuck yourself, Ross.” Dan replied in a hushed tone, spinning around to find Arin stood watching, frozen with shock and horror at what he’d just seen, “I’m so sorry, Arin.” He shook his puffy Jew-fro, it bounced around, some pieces falling into Danny’s face as he quickly left the office.

|-/

Arin turned to Ross, hoping for an explanation, “What the fuck did you do? I’ve never seen him like that before…”

“Nothing, fuck off.” Ross snapped, not in the mood to talk to anybody at the moment.

“ _That_ did _not_ look like nothing to me.” Spoke Arin.

“Just piss off, I’m not in the mood.” He stomped off like a child.

“Well then.” Muttered Arin under his breath, going back to the animation he was working on before he was so rudely interrupted, but Danny’s words still bothered him. He could hear this weird, broken-hearted sorrow in his voice. Danny wasn’t okay no matter what he said.

Arin shook his head to snap himself out of the trance he’d been lost in for close to ten minutes now. He quickly turned the television on to keep his mind occupied while he worked on his animation but he kept hearing Dan’s voice in his head and it wouldn’t go away no matter what he did to try and get rid of it.

|-/

Dan got up, slowly making his way to his built-in bathroom in his room, rummaging through some stuff for a while until it was in his hands. Dan pressed the icy cold blade to his scared wrist, slowly,  _very_ slowly, sliding the blade over it. The thick crimson blood leaking out from the slit in his skin, all the pain pouring out, running down his arm and crashing down onto the white porcelain sink, staining it red. He repeated this process multiple times on both wrists. Daniel sobbed hard, so hard he couldn't see and breathing seemed impossible. He dropped the blade, sinking to his knees on the floor and hugged himself, 7 _billion_ people on earth and he still felt so alone.

Dan gripped the blood covered razor off of the floor, staring at his red-tinted reflection, his thoughts racing a mile a minute. The one that stood out to him, the one that scared him the most was; _You look good in red._ The boy gasped, dropping the blade again and sliding away from it, eyes wide in horror.

You know those moments when you say something out loud to someone that you instantly regret and you know you can’t take it back?  That’s how Danny felt, that weird sinking feeling after that thought hit him. It felt like when he told Ross he was gay and when he first said that he loved Arin and meant it.

The words kept playing over and over, **_You look good in red._**


	3. Three - I Can't Lose You Too.

By the end of the month Dan had lost everyone except for Arin due to his outbursts of anger or sadness. Brian didn't exactly _hate_ him... He was just sick of Dan's shitty attitude and him lashing out for no reason so he told Danny to call him when he's snapped out of it, he still hadn't called.

That day was a bad day, Dan couldn't even force himself from bed that morning, forcing him to have to call Arin to let him know he couldn't make it.

"Hey, where are you?" Arin spoke instantaneously.

"Hey, man... Um... I'm having a bit of a rough day and don't think I'm up for leaving my house today... I'm sorry." Danny felt awful, he _really_ wanted to see Arin.

"Are you okay? Do you need anything? I'll be over in like fourty-five minutes!" _Fuck,_ he was too damn sweet and cared way too much about Dan.

"I-I've been better and, um... I- um... I don't know. You don't have to come it's okay, I don't want to be a burdon."

"You sound so sad, Danny..." Arin was so worried about the man, "I really don't want you to be sad and I'm gonna be there soon with lots of sweets and movies." Arin gave Dan no way to bail.

"But-"

"See you in about an hour." The line went dead.

And Danny couldn't stop smiling.

○○○

Danny and Arin were sat on Dan's bed, movies, empty candy wrappers and other various items were strewn about the room. There was a movie playing in the background as the pair played an intense game of Cards Against Humanity, that Dan was at the moment beating Arin at.

"No! Fuck you! I won, mines better!" Argued Arin as Dan sat laughing hysterically, Arin was not happy about the fact Danny was kicking his ass at it.

"Fine, fine." Giggled Dan, "Okay, you win." Dan gasped for air, gripping his sides tightly, he felt happy again.

Without thinking Danny tugged his hoodie over his head and reached for another black question card but Arin stopped him, grabbing Dan's arm. At first Danny didn't understand what the boy was doing but then a panic sunk in, sending him into a cold-sweat. Arin turned his friend's scrawny arms in his hands looking down at the deep scrapings, scratches and scars etched into the older's wrists. A small gasp escaped Arin's sweet pink lips as his eyes looked over the markings.

"Danny..." He breathed in shock, "Wh-Why?" Was all he could possibly stammer out.

"Arin... I-I..." Danny whimpered, his voice cracking as he started shaking anxiously, "I'm sorry... I've just felt so alone... I didn't know what else to do... And no, I couldn't have come to you about it..."

"Why not? Danny you know that you can tell me anything." He spoke sadly.

"I just can't! I wish I could, I really do but I can't!" Dan held back tears, he felt stupid and weak enough so he would not start crying right now, not in front of Arin.

"Do you not trust me?"

"That's not it, Arin! I-I... I just... Urgh! Can we not do this now? Please." He begged.

"I'll drop the subject if you promise to never do that again and take care of yourself." Arin told him, "I'll be checking on you everyday, Leigh."

"Okay..." A smile spread across Dan's face. He only agreed because he would do anything for Arin.

Danny was taken aback when Arin suddenly threw his arms around the taller, gripping him tightly and burying his face into the crook of the older's neck. Dan felt his neck grow damp, Arin was crying?

"Arin?" Dan murmured into his friend, "Please don't cry..." Dan whimpered on the verge of tears again himself, "I'm sorry, it's all my fault... I'm so sorry" He mumbled feeling depressed once again.

"No, Danny, I've just been so worried about you but I was too stupid, ignorant and selfish to notice you crying out for help and I feel like _the worst_ friend in the world." Arin told him after moving his now puffy-eyed and bright red face away from Danny's shoulder Daniel reached a shaking hand over and wiped away the stray tears that were rested on his friend's cutely-pudgy cheeks, he was _so_ tempted to press his lips to Arin's sweet and appetizing ones, but he contained himself, Danny _could not_ lose Arin.

"You are the best friend in the world Arin, you don't push me to do things I'm not comfortable doing, you don't use my personal things against me and you're the only one that I feel okay around, you can make me happy no matter how bad I feel. Like when I called in this morning, when I feel that bad, those are the times I- erm... Hurt myself but with you around I didn't even remember that existed. You saved my life, Arin." Danny spoke, "I love you."

"I love you too, Danny." Arin smiled, "You're the best friend I could ever have."

○○○

Around two weeks had passed and Arin did keep his promise and he was making sure Danny was taking care of himself, like for example, if he was eating properly and not hurting himself and other things like that. Danny really appreciated it, someone actually _cared_ about and Dan wondered how he got so lucky.

"Dan!?" Called Arin's sweet voice echoed throughout his small apartment. Dan had told Arin he wasn't up for leaving the house that day and Arin was there in less than hour with Chinese food, video games and sweets. God, Dan loved him.

"Be out in a sec!" Danny called back, unraveling himself from his blanket cocoon and making his way out to his living area to find his T.V. on, Mariokart up on it with Arin on the couch waiting for Dan. Two plates and several Chinese food containers littered the table across from from.

"Hey sleepy-head." Giggled Arin with a giant doofy grin spread across his face, and without a word Dan jumped on top of his friend who was sprawled out on the couch, hugging him tightly.

"You are the best, Arin! Thank you so much!" Danny exclaimed, into Arin's chest where his face was now buried.

"Well you're my best friend and I love you so, of course I'm the best." Joked Arin, hugging Danny back.

"I love you too... You are too good, you deserve better." Danny muttered into Arin's chest again. Arin just sighed and shook his head.

"I can't _find_ anyone better because you are the best." Arin mumbled after a while, sitting up and breaking their hug to get food from the table.

"Awe." Was all Danny said, a huge smile plastered to his face as he got food as well.

○○○

This day had started so well and now it seemed as though nothing could fix it, the yelling and shouting was crushing Dan, it made him want to end it right here right now.

"I mean, what the fuck kind of friend are you?! You don't even trust me enough to tell me what's wrong with you! But you can fucking tell _Ross!?_ " Growled Arin, neither boy even knew why they were yelling or fighting, they just were, so much tension between them that they just finally lost it.

"Well I can't tell _you_ for a reason!" Dan yelped, "I can't lose you! I will if I tell you and I just can't!" He shouted at his friend.

"Why the fuck would you lose me!? I'm so confused!" Groaned Arin.

"You wouldn't get it, you just don't understand!"

"Understand _what!?_ "

"Can't you fucking see it!?" Dan shouted in frustration, "I'm in love with you, Arin! I always have been!"


	4. Four - The Fear Of Falling Apart

“I’m in love with you, Arin! I always have been!” Cried Danny, “And it’s just not fair, Arin! If I’m fucking louder will you finally listen!? I am in love with my best friend, Arin Hanson! Is that good enough for you to finally fucking see!? I’ve tried so hard for _years_ but you just fucking dismiss me!” Dan shouted in anger and frustration, he felt so vulnerable and pathetic, stood in front of the love of his life a sobbing and yelling mess of emotions. Arin just stood in complete shock, he just couldn’t believe what Dan had just admitted to him.

“Uh… I-I just… Danny, I’m-I’m married, I just… I… I don’t know what-what to say… I…” Arin shook his head, starting to shake anxiously, “I’m so confused, Leigh… I don’t know what to do… I’m so-… I-I… I just, I just…” Arin ran his shaky fingers through his hair. He now saw Danny differently for some strange reason, it wasn’t in a bad way either, Arin just felt…. Different and extremely confused.

Dan felt the pain in his chest become unbearable and he couldn’t hold back the tears any longer, Dan was so in love that it was practically killing him, “I’m sorry, I’ve ruined our friendship, this is why I never planned on actually telling you!” Dan felt like he could just die at this moment.

“Danny no, it’s fine, it’s okay… It’s just that I’m married, Danny… I’m in l-love with-with… Suzy.” His voice faltered as his tongue caught the lie he was speaking before he even knew it was a lie that he’d spoken.

"I want you to be happy, Arin..." Sobbed Danny as he tried furiously to wipe the tears away from his eyes, even though Arin had already seen how weak the much taller and older male was in that moment, "But... I want to be the reason." His voice broke as he sobbed again, covering his mouth with his hand in attempt to hide the agony he was in. His chest grew tighter and his shattered heart impaling him. Arin turned away, he couldn't bear to see the pain in his friend’s eyes, the pain _he_ caused. The sounds of Dan’s muffled, broken-hearted sobs, echoing through the room, soft whimpers slipping from his lips occasionally, silently pleading for help. Arin spun around to face Danny again, tears in his own eyes looking at his friend, so torn up and fragile. The smaller boy opened his arms, stepping up to Daniel, engulfing him in a hug, Danny didn't hesitate to grip the younger even tighter, burying his face into the crook of Arin's neck while he continued to sob, his body shaking violently.

"I'm sorry." Daniel cried harder, "I'm such a fuck-up and I'm so sorry..." I'm sorry." Danny spoke and clutched Arin in his scrawny arms as tight as possible, as if letting him go would cause him to disappear.

"No, no... Danny... Please don't say that... Please..." Arin pleaded, he needed to think. Arin had no idea what to do, he was married to Suzy… He _loved_ her. Though now he couldn’t even think of what love even meant, he wasn’t sure of what to do. All Arin had ever known was Suzy… That was until Danny came along.

"Why shouldn't I!?" Danny snapped abruptly, shoving Arin from away from him making the smaller jump back, "Why the fuck shouldn't I!? It's so fucking true! I ruin goddamn _everything_ Arin!” He spat with distaste, “I made everyone leave and now I've lost the only person I have ever fucking cared about, my best friend and the love of m-“ Arin grasped him suddenly by the collar of his shirt and their lips quickly collided, it was the only thing he could think to do and it felt right, so he did it. Danny stood in shock at what his friend had done, frozen for a moment, not knowing what was going on, his mind flooded with thoughts,   _Should I kiss him back? What's happening? Arin said he loved Suzy! He’d fucking married, you **can’t** do this Danny, it’s wrong! What does this mean? Does he feel the same? Or could he just feel bad? No... Arin would just tell me-…_ His thoughts were lost as Arin moved closer, pulling Danny against him, making all of his doubt wash away along with all of the pain and ache in his body. Dan melted into the touch of the other, a bittersweet taste slipping from Arin's mouth into Dan's, making the taller moaned into him.

"Hey! Arin!?" The both jumped apart and Arin's eyes got wide with fear, it was Suzy calling for him from the other room. He quickly realized what he had done and now had that awful, sick panicked feeling rushing throughout him. Arin felt like he was going to be sick at the thought of deciding between the two, because he knew deep down if he could chose he would pick Danny.

"I'll be there in a second!" He called weirily before whispering to Dan, "I'm sorry..." And dashing from the kitchen to see his wife, leaving his best friend flustered and confused. Danny didn't say a word, knowing that what Arin did was wrong and even though he _really_ enjoyed it, he felt like he did a bad thing as well, _this was all his fault._

|-/

Danny sat alone, his mind filled with thoughts of Arin, his lips still tingling from his friends sweet tasting ones, he wished instead of the ghost of what had happened still shivering on his lips, that it could really be him, that Danny could have the delicious taste of his best friend’s lips on his once again. He needed the aromatic sent of Arin to fill him. Danny snapped back into reality when he heard the front door close, a sigh escaped his lips, Barry was home and that usually ended with someone pissed off.

“Apology gift?” He heard in the one voice he would have never expected, Dan’s head whipped in the direction of the sweet sound.

“Arin?” He asked in awe, “I thought that you’d be mad… Or like awkward…” Dan mumbled nervously, he never felt this way around Arin but now for some strange reason he did.

“Nah… Well I mean… It is kinda awkward.” He said sadly, sitting on the couch beside Danny, who laid his head against his friend’s shoulder tiredly.

“I thought I lost you.” Danny spoke up after a while of sitting in a comfortable silence.

“Dude, I am going to be here to annoy your ass till the day you die.” Laughed Arin as he ruffled Danny’s already messy hair, Danny only smiled, having no energy left in him, “Are you okay, Danny? Do you hate me for what I did? Be honest because I would hate me too if I were you.”

“I don’t hate you… I hate myself because I can’t stop loving you.” Danny murmured on the verge of tears, “And, no, Arin… I’m not okay…” He said, letting a few stray tears fall onto Arin’s bony shoulder.

“Don’t beat yourself up about it… It’s not your fault that you feel that way, you can’t help it.”

“I know I can’t but I can’t live feeling like this all the time! I hurt so much because I fucking love you so much that it legitimately hurts, Arin. I can’t live like this and I can’t live without you so what the fuck do I do man?” Danny was in tears again. Arin pulled him into a hug, rubbing his back calmingly as Danny held onto him as well.

“Danny…? C-Can I tell you something? I think it could make you feel better but also worse at the same time.” Arin spoke after Dan seemed to calm down a bit.

“What is it? Is everything okay?” Danny asked, slight worry laced in his voice.

“I-… Um… Dan, you confuse me…” Arin said, muttering a ‘ _fuck_ ’ to himself as Dan looked at him weird, “I mean like sexually… You confuse me and make me flustered! I love Suzy or at least I think I did at one point but now I just really don’t know anymore…” Arin sighed, shaking his head. Danny only sighed and pressed his face into Arin’s chest, trying to hide his sadness.

“But you’re married to Suzy so you are gonna have to stay with her… You love her more and I know you’d regret being with someone like me so why bother.” Danny’s depressed state was not helping the situation.

“I know I’m married to Suzy, Dan but I mean… She’s all I’ve ever known so… Like… I don’t know what I’m trying to say here, Dan.” He sighed flatly. Danny looked up at him and gave the best smile he could muster even with the pain he was in. Dan reached up and ran his fingers through the boy’s soft hair.

“I’m sorry that I ruin everything, Arin.” Dan said as he let go of Arin and sat up on his own, “I really hate myself.”

“Stop it right now. You need to learn that not everything is your fault, Leigh. I care about you too much to listen to this self-hating.” Arin shook his head at the boy.

“I have to tell you something…” Danny said suddenly, “You’re gonna be mad at me though… Please don’t yell.” He sounded like a hurt child.

“What happened? What did you do?” Arin began to worry, and Danny held out his arms to Arin, giving him a sorry look, hanging his head sadly, Arin felt this weirdly sick feeling bubbling in his chest as he took Danny’s hands and pressed his lips against Dan’s tattered wrists. Tears fell from Arin’s tired eyes, landing on Danny’s wrists, causing him to recoil, “Was that too weird…?”

“No… Just… That hurt.” Dan replied as he wiped away his love's tears.

“I’m sorry, Dan. Um… Uh… Dan? Do you think that I should tell Suzy?” He stammered anxiously.

“No!” Danny replied quickly, “That could ruin your marriage and the Game Grumps! Are you crazy!?”

“But… Danny I really like you and I can’t bear to see you in this much pain, I want you to be happy again…” Arin told him.

“No, I’m not worth it… I’ve seen you and Suzy together, you love her more than you could ever love me. Trust me this will pass, you’ll be back to feeling the same way as you used to by next week… You just feel bad so you think that you like me.” Danny didn’t want Arin to lose everything over someone like him. Arin would get over him, that’s what he thought at least.

“Danny, I realized that it’s always been you. Since you came into my life it’s just been better and that’s all that I need to know. When I kissed you I felt something that I never felt with Suzy. I know this is meant to be.” Argued Arin.

“How about if you wait a month and then see how you feel then? Sound good?” Danny really just wanted to make sure that this is what Arin wanted because Dan didn’t want to be the reason that he is unhappy.

 Arin inhaled sharply, thinking for a moment, “Okay.” He replied, “But wait… Can I just do one thing real quick?” Arin asked.

“Sure, what-“ Arin grabbed Danny once again, kissing him with a hard and sweet passion that stunned Dan. Arin was soon pinning Danny beneath him, their lips moving in sync and their tongues dancing between each of their mouths. Arin was really into this and wanted more but didn’t dare attempt to deepen it, afraid of how Danny would react. Arin let out a moan, subconsciously grinding his hips against Danny’s, causing Danny’s whole body to stiffen momentarily, letting out a surprised gasp.

“No sex until you’re married.” Mumbled Dan against Arin’s lips.

“I am.” He smirked, still not trying anything too crazy or too far out there.

“I hate you.” Danny moaned into him

“Good.” Arin replied with a soft laugh. Danny heard the faint slam of his flat door, signaling someone was there, but Arin obviously didn’t hear it because he didn’t move from on top of Danny. The taller, shoved Arin off quickly and sat up, trying to tame his messy hair as Arin fell to the floor, “What the fuck was that for, did you n-“

“Shut the fuck up, Barry’s home.” Danny hissed through gritted teeth in a hushed tone, just after he finished scolding the boy on the floor, Barry entered the room, looking pretty damn tired.

“What the hell are you two up to?” Barry asked after surveying the situation for a moment.

“Uh!” Danny swallowed hard, his mind drawing a blank.

“Danny was being an asshole so I hit him and he threw me off the couch.” Arin covered and Danny let out a relieved sigh.

“Weirdos… Keep it down, I’m going to bed.” And Barry was gone.

“Thank fuck, you saved us because I had nothing.” Dan said with a laugh.

“You are so lucky to have me.” Arin joked, “Oh, shit it’s getting late as fuck! I should head out, see you tomorrow.” Arin stood and kissed Dan once more before dashing from the apartment, leaving Dan with a smile across his face that just wouldn’t fade.

|-/

“Ross…! Ross…! Ross!” Dan shouted as he hurried into the Grump Office the next morning, Dan was still ecstatic over the previous day.

“What this fuck do you want.” He growled, narrowing his eyes.

“Listen, I am so sorry for being a dick before but I have to talk to you, come with me!” Dan said everything as fast as possible as he grabbed Ross' wrist tugging him into the Grump room. Nobody was even in the office yet so this was perfect.

“What is it?” He sounded less like an asshole.

“Arin and I got in an argument yesterday day and I accidentally let it slip that I really, _really_ liked him and we kinda kissed, and…” Danny rambled on and on about everything, Ross listening intently and excitedly.

“You know what, I fucking ship it man! Egobang is sailing!” He spoke excitedly.

“Egobang?”

“That’s your ship name… Just go Google it.”

That was not a good idea because Danny got hooked on he fanfictions and the fanart and the blogs and everything about it. Danny was obsessed.


	5. Five - Teach Me, Daddy, Teach Me

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry Danny 's sex scene is much shorter, I just ran out of time to write it in more detail, I may go and fix it up sometime soon!

Arin was sat alongside his slightly smaller friend, Mark. The two had just finished a collaboration video together and were just playing some video games for fun in the Grump room. Danny was out for the day doing some NSP stuff with Brian.

“Hey, Mark?” Arin spoke as the continued to play Mariokart, “Would you mind if I just kinda got something off my chest here, like bro to bro.”

Mark paused the game and turned to face his friend, “Yeah, of course, what’s up?”  He asked, slightly worried.

“Well… You know how, Danny was acting really weird for a while?” Arin asked, getting a nod from Mark, “Well, um… We got into a really heated fight, I don’t even remember why, but he kind of told me that he was in love with me…” His voice trailed.

“What! What’d you say to him!?” Mark was now fully invested in the story.

“ _Well…_ I didn’t really ‘ _say’_ anything…” Murmured Arin, his face heading up slightly just at the thought of kissing his best friend.

“What the fuck does that even mean?” Mark furrowed his eyebrows.

“I-um… Er, kinda… Uh- um… Kissed him…?” He said more as a question than a statement. What was undenounced to either of the men was that Suzy was stood outside the door, frozen with her hand on the door handle, all she wanted to do was ask what they wanted her to order for lunch and she heard the last thing she could have ever expected, though now that he had heard him say it, it did make sense.

“The worst part is that I think that I may have always been in love with Danny, even from the moment we met. I mean I do… Well I _did_ love Suzy and don’t get me wrong, I still do but just not like I did before. I just… I think that Danny’s the one.” He rambled on the verge of tears, “I don’t know what to do, Mark.”

“Have you told Suzy yet?” Mark asked, “What about Danny? Does he know how you feel?”

“I did tell Danny but he told me to wait about a month to see if I _really_ wanted to end my marriage over him, so we decided that it would be best to wait and talk to her about it later… Mark, I love him so much and I know that I want to be with him but I don’t want to hurt Suzy… Plus she’s all I’ve ever known… Ya know what I mean?”

“Considering I broke off my engagement to be with Jack after we got drunk one night and fucked, yeah, I kinda do.” Mark chuckled.

“I forget about that a lot.” Arin smiled, it gave him some kind of hope to see how happy him and Jack were together even after all this time. Arin was so happy to finally get all of this off his chest.

|-/

“Hey, um… Arin?” Danny spoke, fidgeting in his seat awkwardly.

“Yeah, babe.” Arin turned to look over at him as he went to put in a different game. Dan’s hear pounded every time Arin used names like that.

“I, erm… Think I’m gonna go home.” Murmured Dan as he placed his controller down.

“What? Why?” Arin asked in confusion, he really didn’t want Danny to go.

“I just don’t feel very good.” Shrugged the older.

“Are you okay?” Arin was now sat beside his friend, worried out of his mind

“I’m fine I promise… I just feel really shitty.” Danny told Arin, who could now see how ill his friend looked. Arin felt so bad for the co-host, he looked super miserable. The smaller male threw his arms around Danny, hugging him comfortingly, Danny’s arms went around Arin in return.

“Just call me if you need anything.” Arin told him, knowing that Barry wasn’t going home after work due to having a new girlfriend, “Love you, Kitten.” Arin mumbled into Dan’s shoulder.

“I will, thank you.” Danny smiled, “Love you too, Big Cat.” He loved the feeling of knowing that his _I love you_ ’s were reciprocated.

○○○

Arin had tried so hard all day, he really did try not to worry about Danny but he just couldn’t help it. This was just another reason piled on top of a giant list of reasons why he was sure that he was in love with Dan, he never stopped thinking about him. Arin had given in about twenty minutes ago and was now at Danny’s apartment.

Not even bothering to knock, using the spare key that Danny had given him forever ago, “Kitten?” Called Arin into the small flat. Danny sat up from where he was laying on the couch with a befuddled expression plastered to his adorable and sexy face.

“Arin?” Danny grumbled tiredly, rubbing at his eyes, “What are you doing here?” He sniffled, his hair standing in every direction and tissues were scattered about the floor around him.

“I-… Uh… I was just checking in on you.” Arin now was flustered and red-faced feeling like an idiot.

“I’m fine, I was just sleeping… Ya know, you could’ve just called.” Danny grinned, glad the other was there.

“I was worried and didn’t really think…” Arin admitted, making Danny laugh softly, his face contorting in pain, but he caught himself quickly, not to worry the male he loved.

“So… Um…” Mumbled Arin awkwardly, rubbing at the back of his neck as he stood by the door.

“Get over here.” Danny smirked, with another laugh and also some sort of awkward yawn, and this time the pain on his face was more evident as Arin came and sat on the edge of the couch near him, pushing some of his damp hair out of Danny’s eyes and looked into them.

“What’s wrong, Danny, are you okay?” The panic in his voice prominent.

“I’m fine, it’s just my stomach…” Danny shrugged, “I’m okay though.”

“Do you need anything?” He asked, “How can I make you feel better?” Arin hated to see Danny like this. Dan let out a long, tired sigh and shrugged again.

“I dunno, I just feel really awful and kinda wanna cuddle.” Danny smirked, hoping that Arin would get the hint.

“I’ll take that as you want _me_ to cuddle with.” He laughed, earning a wide smile and a nod from the taller.

“Please, Big Cat.” Danny pouted, pleading with the sweet boy beside him.

“Okay.” He giggled. Dan opened his arms and Arin climbed into them, laying with the one he truly loved. Dan let out a small whimper at the pain in his abdomen, wanting to cry from the sharp ache, but he refused to show his pain, not wanting to upset his already worried friend, “What’s wrong, Dan?” Arin asked but Danny just shook his head in response, “Leigh Daniel Avidan…” Arin spoke sternly.

“I just don’t feel well; you know how I get when I’m sick.” Dan’s voice came out more as a whine, on the verge of tears and he quickly tried to blink them away.

“If you’ll tell me _what_ doesn’t feel well I can try and make it better.”

“It’s my stomach but I’m fine.” Danny whined like a small child.

“Don’t you lie to me; I know you’re not fine.” Arin scolded. Danny finally couldn’t take the pain anymore as it became unbearable, tears sliding down his cheeks silently.

“I just don’t want to make you worry.” The older pouted. Arin sighed, wiping away the tears from the male’s eyes and bright pink cheeks. He gently pressed his icy fingers to Dan’s scalding hot forehead.

“Danny I’m _always_ worried about you.” Arin moved to lay, stretched out across the couch, on his back. The smaller positioned the sick boy to lay on his side, somewhat on top of him, their legs intertwined. Arin placed his hand firmly on Danny’s extremely flat stomach, drawing circles against his friend’s heated skin, “Does this help?” Arin spoke softly to the ill man who was tangled around the younger comfortably. Danny nodded tiredly in response into Arin’s chest, his bushy Jew-fro rubbing against Arin’s scruffy cheeks.

Arin reached over, grabbing the television remote and pressed the power button. Thankfully, the T.V. was not deafeningly loud as it usually was so Dan merely stirred in his sleep when the sound abruptly echoed throughout the room.

Arin ended up spending the night after falling asleep alongside Danny around Midnight that night.

|-/

Danny was sprawled out across the couch, his legs laid across Arin’s lap as they played video games almost a week later. Barry wasn’t home, which was pretty typical these days, so it was just the two secret lovers.

“I’m gonna fucking win!” Cheered Arin, this was most-likely their tenth or so round of Rocket League and he still hadn’t won a single game.

“No you aren’t, asshole!” Danny smirked as he intercepted the ball before Arin could get it in, Danny easily got it in his goal with zero seconds left in the game.

“Fuck!” Shouted Arin angrily, throwing the controller to the floor, “Suck my motherfucking dick!” He grumbled.

“Gladly.” Dan joked, winking playfully, he was suddenly pinned to the couch, Arin’s soft and sweet tasting lips were on his, surprising him slightly. Easily Arin made Dan begin moaning as he grinded this hips against the older’s. _Goddamn Arin was hot._ Dan couldn’t help but think about how it would feel to fuck Arin, to have _him_ pinned to the couch like this, with his massive hard-on shoved deep inside of the younger man. Danny _needed_ this to happen, he needed to be filled with Arin’s sweet juices.

“Were you serious?” Asked Arin, definitely horny by this point.

“Not really but, I’m up for it.” Dan smirked, biting down on Arin’s lips with a moan, “Did I ever tell you that I used to make, like, really shitty porno’s?” Danny said with a grin as his lips brushed against Arin’s.

“No but you could show me what you learned.” Arin moaned against him, “Talk dirty to me, Daddy.” He smiled smugly as Danny moaned at the name.

“I want to shove my hard cock up inside of your sweet, sexy ass.” Danny mumbled giving Arin a small, sly grin, “And I want to fuck you, _so_ hard that you won’t be able to walk for a month.” Arin moaned as Danny fiddled with the clasp of his best friend’s belt. Arin slid Danny’s shirt up over the male’s head and Dan did the same to him. Danny felt Arin’s hand move to be pressed against the fabric of his jeans, rubbing at his crotch slowly, teasing him, Danny could feel the slight sneer on Arin’s lips grow wide along with his own member growing stiff.

“Getting a bit excited I see.” Arin spoke with a devilish smirk on his lips and a fire in his eyes. Danny arched his back, moaning into the other, _Jesus Christ Arin was so fucking sexy._

“Hurry up and fuck me already.” He whined, begging for Arin at this point. When Arin refused to do so and continued to be a tease, Danny moved so his hand was inside of Arin’s pants. Dan’s cold fingers slowly and gently traced over his friend’s cock. Arin gasped at the coolness of Dan’s hands and at the sweet pleasure causing his large prick to instantly get hard. Arin moaned anxious for Danny to do things to him, “You ready little one.” Danny spoke with a sexy rasp in his voice which was now deeper than Arin had ever heard it. Arin went to speak but he couldn’t get out any words, just a moan as Dan cupped his dick in his massive hands, “What do you want me to do to you, short-stuff?” Danny sounded nothing like himself and for some reason, this new side of Dan really turned Arin on.

“Y-You’re the master, Daddy.” He gasped, just Danny’s touch was enough to stun him.

“Have you ever gotten a blowy from a man before?” Danny smirked, now a fire blazing his eyes.

“No, but I’d love one from you.” Arin finally started to become more confidant.

“So you’d like a beej?” Danny smiled, giggling a bit and causing Arin to giggle a bit too.

“I would love that.” Arin smiled at Danny slowly stripped the two down to only their bare naked bodies, it felt amazing, the skin on skin contact. Danny’s eyes widened as they landed on what he was putting in his mouth, or more like all the way down his throat. Arin was massive, he was much larger than Danny and that caused Danny to kind of feel insecure but the thoughts quickly faded as Arin stood in front of Danny who was still on the couch. Danny got onto his knees, going to place his lips around the tip of Arin’s shaft but stopped and looked up at Arin.

“Are you sure you want to do this?” Asked Danny, just to make sure.

“Yes, now just give me a damn beej.” Arin spoke seductively but Danny still couldn’t help at giggle at the stupid word. Though Danny did as he was asked nonetheless, slowly taking just about half of Arin’s hard cock in his mouth, slowly moving back and forth across the length of his member. Danny heard a gasp escaped Arin’s slightly parted lips as his body tensed and he threw his head back in pleasure, “Oh… Danny.” He moaned out, “Mmmh.” Arin hadn’t felt a better sensation in his entire life, Dan’s mouth was warm and pleasing against his hard-on. Danny’s tongue danced over his best mate’s long boner. The older somehow managed to get all of Arin’s prick into his mouth, mostly down his throat, Danny never knew he didn’t have a gag reflex.

“Oh, fuck! Danny I-I’m gonna-“ Arin didn’t even get to finish what he was saying before he came into Dan’s mouth, though Danny wasn’t a fucking wimp so he swallowed Arin’s sweet tasting juices, moaning himself, “What would you like, Mr. Sexbang?” Smirked Arin, ready to have his way with Danny.

Danny pulled Arin back to the couch, “Do you think that you’re ready for your first anal?” Danny asked and saw a nervous look in Arin’s eyes, “You could give me a handy, or maybe a blowy?” Danny told him, not wanting to make him too uncomfortable.

“Um…?” Arin was honestly flustered, he was so unexperienced in things like this, though he really enjoyed it, he’d never felt this much passion between him and Suzy before… He _loved_ this feeling and never wanted it to leave, “What do you think I wouldn’t suck at?”

“Well, I don’t know about a beej, but maybe a handy or some anal would work okay for you I think.” Danny said confidently.

“Could you handle a bit of both, big boy.” Arin smirked at Dan who gave him an approving nod, “Alright-y.” Dan positioned himself on the couch, propped up on his hands and knees, Arin behind him on his knees. The shorter male slowly inserted just the tip as he got himself ready, he slowly began to thrust his hips back and forth, putting one hand on Dan’s hip and the other was gripping Dan’s extremely hard cock. He moved his hand along Dan’s dick, keeping rhythm with his thrusting.

“Faster.” Moaned Dan and Arin did as he was told, his hips moving much faster than before, along with his hand, “Arin… Oh my god…” Hummed Dan, “Holy fucking shit…” He breathed out, “Faster, Big Daddy, faster.” Dan arched his back with pleasure, surprised by how amazing Arin was at this for never doing it before. Arin thrust much harder and faster, gasping himself.

“Mmmh, Leigh.” Groaned Arin loudly, “Fuck!” He moaned feeling Danny cum into his hand. Both men separated after a moment more of Arin thrusting into the older. Danny collaped to the couch, Arin landing on top of him.

“Fuck, I love you.” Danny mumbled, closing his eyes and pulling the blanket off the back of the sofa to cover their exposed bodies.

“I love you too, Danny.” Arin yawned, cuddling into the older male. And in this moment they both knew what must be done.


	6. The Talk

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Arin and Suzy have a talk

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello everyone! My name is Danny and i'll be taking over this fic for now. I hope the change of writing style doesn't throw you off too much  
> hope you like it!  
> -Danny

The next morning came a little too fast for the Arin’s taste, the sun burning through the window blinds—waking him up from what was probably the best sleep he’s had in his life. He sat up and looked next to the sleeping Danny, his features just as stunning as ever but there was something different now about the way Arin looked at Dan. Arin leaned down and kissed the older man’s forehead before sliding out of the couch as quietly as possible, attempting to keep a sleeping Danny sleeping. The younger male made his way to the bathroom, and looked at himself in the mirror; he looked drained. He then slipped his boxers and shirt back on, feeling a pang of regret from the activities of last night, everything was so mixed up in his head. 

What was he going to do? What about Suzy? His head was spinning but he knew deep down what had to be done, and his resolve burned bright—It burned for Danny. It was a resolve that once lived and breathed by his wife, the love of his life, or what seemed to be the love of his life at the time. The flashbacks from last night sent his heart beating faster than it ever been, and his face heated up at the thought; without a doubt he was in love with his best friend and was ready to face the consequences. 

Arin sighed, turning on the water faucet and splashing cold water on his face. 

“Arin?” Dan called out, realizing the younger man wasn’t there, sending a wave of anxiety through him. Did he go too far last night? Did Arin hate him? All those self loathing thoughts seem to rush in at once, overwhelming him to the point where his body began to shook. 

Arin heard his name and walked out and went back to the couch where he witnessed his best friend shake like a leaf; he hated seeing Dan in pain. The younger man sat back down next to the other and wrapped his arms around him, savoring the way Dan felt in his arms. “I’m here.” He simply stated. 

Dan slowly calmed down and closed his eyes, feeling himself engulfed in the other man’s scent, feeling safe in the other man’s arms. Dan slowly wrapped his arms around the other as well, clenching his fists in the man’s shirt and bringing him closer. Something seemed off about Arin, but he pushed that thought out of his head for now; he just wanted to be with him in this moment and nothing else mattered to him, nothing else ever mattered more than Arin. 

“I-I thought you left, I didn’t..”Dan trailed on, feeling his body shake at the thought. 

“I’m not going anywhere, you clod.” Arin ran his fingers up and down Dan’s back “I love you, I wouldn’t do that.” 

Those words alone were enough to set Dan at ease, anything Arin said he believed and this was no different. Waiting a month; could he really do that? He wanted this man to himself no matter how selfish it seemed—nonetheless this was the right thing to do...right?

Later that day, Dan had to meet up with Brian to work on Ninja Sex party, and Arin went home; this was the perfect opportunity now that his wife was there. 

They sat on either side of the kitchen table, you could cut the tension with a knife. Arin swallowed hard and took a deep breath before looking his wife in the eyes.

“Suzy, you’re my best friend and I love you, I hope you know that..I just..” Arin’s eyes filled with tears, and his heart was racing, he didn’t want to hurt her but there was no other way for him to be happy.

“Shh..It’s okay, Arin—I know about Dan.” Suzy said, gripping his hand softly. 

Arin’s face turned white “You-You what?”

Suzy sighed “When you were talking with Mark that day, I was coming to get your lunch order’s and I heard everything.”

“Suzy I-”

“Arin. I can’t really say I’m surprised, you and Dan have been close as close can be for years now, and you have so much love to give that it’s only natural to feel like this.” Suzy gave a sad smile.

“I love him, Suzy. I’m so sorry you had to find out like that; I just didn’t know what to do and Dan was going through a rough time and I was just scared.” 

“I know baby, I don’t blame you. Do what makes you happy and if Dan is that one that makes you happy then I’ll sign divorce papers if you need.” Suzy said, shaking a little; yes she knew about the whole thing but it was still so hard for her, this was the man she thought was her soul mate. 

After that conversation, Arin and Suzy sat there and cried for a little-- with their relationship coming to its final end, they had so many left emotions inside. 

That night, Arin went back to Danny’s house and let himself in with the key under the mat; he had things to discuss with him tonight and about things that would change their lives probably forever. Arin sat on Danny’s bed anxiously waiting, looking at the things hung up on the man’s wall; the records, the CD’s, his ninja sex part posters—all of it symbolized Danny perfectly and it brought a smile upon the younger man’s face. 

The sound of the door unlocking snapped Arin out of his thoughts as he walked the living room and leaning in the door way of the hall. He smiled and crossed his arms, happy to see Danny home. Dan put down his things and turned his attention to the hall, raising his eyebrow.

“Arin, is everything okay?” Danny asked.

“Everything is fine. Sorry, I used your spare key I hope that was okay.” 

“That’s fine, it’s just not like you is all.” Dan shrugged walking over and hugging his lover.

“We need to talk, let’s sit down and relax.” Arin said, walking over to Danny’s bed and sitting down with him, holding both of his hands.

Danny looked at the other worried and caressed his hands with his thumbs.

“Here goes nothing, I’ve told Suzy everything; We’ve decided to get a divorce.”


	7. Authors Note! FANART/FANFIC CONTEST!!!

Hello everyone!  
I have decided that I wanted to start a Fanart/Fanfiction contest to see what you can come up with!

So! Many of you have read/ are reading the stuff I’ve written and I wanted to get you all involved. And what better way to do that than a contest! (It doesn’t have to be my stories that you use if you absolutely do not want to read them)

Anyway, I'll get to the point now...

Artists;  
I want YOU to draw some fanart from your favorite part of any story or a part you want to happen!  
You can also do a comic strip of your favorite part/ of a quote that you enjoyed and what you would use it as (Create your own story thing.)

Writers;  
I want YOU to write something you want to happen or the continuation of some part that I either left out or didn't put in.  
You can also take a quote that you liked and your favorite ship and make something from that!

Must be sent to me on any of these that you chose!

Tumblr - Egobangarooni  
Instagram - Patty_Stumpkins (or Egobangaroooni)  
Wattpad - the-bandlife-choseme  
Kik - The_Bandlife_ChoseMe  
My Email - SoldMySoulForTumblr@gmail.com

(They can be posted anywhere, not just here!)

Winners will be announced on - June 28th  
(Will be extended if needed)

I will be choosing winners for the following catigories!  
Most Creative!  
Best Idea!  
Best Comic!  
Best Fanfic!  
Best Art!  
(others may be added, just ask)

If you have any questions message me on any of those accounts I listed above!

Winners will get shoutouts 

recommendations

story/art of your choice

physical copy of High Up/ Lilac Sky/ Brightest Stars (when they are finished)

(candy?????)

(Send me what you think I should also send out/do)

Thanks,  
Emma


End file.
